Till the sun dies
by 411charlee
Summary: This fic continues from the end of "Sorry" - This fic explores the conversations Olicity has building their relationship after Oliver confesses that he wants to be with Felicity and what we see in the beginning of 4x01. This is dedicated to all my followers on Tumblr (charlinert.) in celebration of my 50 Follow Forever.


**Chapter 1 – Haunted**

 ** _Little do you know_**

 ** _How I'm breaking while you fall asleep_**

 ** _Little do you know_**

 ** _I'm still haunted by the memories_**

 ** _Little do you know_**

 ** _I'm trying to pick myself up piece by piece_**

 ** _Little do you know_**

 ** _I need a little more time_**

 ** _Underneath it all I'm held captive by the hole inside_**

 ** _I've been holding back for the fear that you might change your mind_**

 ** _I'm ready to forgive you but forgetting is a harder fight_**

 ** _Little do you know_**

 ** _I need a little more time_**

 ** _I'll wait, I'll wait_**

 ** _I love you like you've never felt the pain,_**

 ** _I'll wait_**

 ** _I promise you don't have to be afraid,_**

 ** _I'll wait_**

 ** _The love is here and here to stay_**

 ** _So lay your head on me_**

She feels numb and dirty and doesn't exactly know how to process what happened the last couple of days. The last thing she vividly remembers is seeing Oliver leaving them in that dungeon and thinking they were going to die, only to wake up and realise that it was all a ruse when Barry saved them.

She knows he has a plan, it just hurts that he decided to trust the person they despised the most instead of them. She still doesn't know what's going on, all she knows is that she needs to see him. She's so angry at him, but she needs to know he's okay.

She hears footsteps in the hall and turns around to find Malcolm Merlyn. The confident bastard with the usual smile on his face oddly looks glum and if she didn't know him that well she would say his expression has a hint of sadness.

"More orders?" She bites out pretending to focus on the screen in front of her.

"Felicity…." He says moving closer very slowly and hands her a sealed off envelope, squeezing her shoulder lightly with the other hand. "I know this doesn't mean anything to you, but I'm truly sorry." He turns around and leaves her behind gaping after him.

Her mind is reeling. She knows what this means. The last time she heard those words out of his mouth was when he placed the blood stained sword on her desk after Oliver's fight with Ra's. She barely made it the last time she thought he was dead and now….now he really could be dead.

She gently drags her fingers over the envelope holding her inked name on the front. She feels conflicted…does she open it or not. She takes a deep breath and tears the top to take out the contents.

Slowly she opens the paper, sending shivers all over her body. Her throat is dry and she can already feel the tears stinging at the back of her eyes. She sees words, but the ink scrambles on the paper forming one massive ink blob. She can't bring herself to focus.

Her knees go weak and she finds herself on her knees on the floor at the thought of losing him yet again. The thought that she will have to bury the life they could have had for good this time. She can't bring herself to read the letter but presses it against her heart as the soft tears become violent sobs. This is all she has left of him. All she has left of her Oliver.

"No Oliver no! Why?! Why?!" She cries out lying on the floor.

"Felicity! It's okay, Felicity!"

She hears his voice but it's far from her. She sobs even more now thinking she's going completely crazy.

"Felicity! Sweetheart wake up! It's okay, you're safe, I'm here."

She opens her eyes to complete darkness and feels disoriented. She can see the outline of Oliver's face and can feel his hands soothing as he caresses her face and her arm bringing her back to reality from her nightmare.

"It's okay. Shhh, I'm here, you're safe."

She sits up in their bed and pulls herself closer to him, holding him so close that she struggles to breathe.

"You were dead. I thought I lost you again and all I had was a letter….a letter and memories of tears Oliver. You were dead."

"Shhh, it's okay, it's going to be okay. I'm right here. It was just a nightmare. I promise I'm okay and you're okay, shhh."

He pulls back to look at her. Her eyes adjusted now to the dark room she can see his face and his eyes. She can see the worry reflecting in his eyes quite clearly now as she takes a deep breath taking in the rest of her surroundings.

He leans over her to get the glass of water next to her side of the bed. She takes it from his hand gently touching his fingers when they make the transition.

"I'm sorry I woke you." She says shyly, looking down at the glass in her hand and then taking a sip of the water.

"Hey, don't you dare apologise. This is all my fault. I put you through hell Felicity and I hate that my actions are causing these nightmares." He shifts next to her and wraps his arms around her shoulders. She's still shivering from the shock of the nightmare and he hates himself that he's the reason.

Felicity places the glass back on the nightstand and turns to him. Caressing his face.

"Please don't blame yourself."

"Felicity…"

"No, hear me out please." She interrupts. "I've had so many disappointments in my life, but knowing you, loving you is not one of them." She gently takes his hands in hers and rubs his knuckles with her thumb. "When I told you that you opened my heart in a way that I never knew was possible, I meant it. I didn't just tell you all that to get you in my pants, at least that wasn't the initial plan." She blushes and shakes her head, realising she actually said that out loud as he huffs a laugh, the same way he always does.

"Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that I love you Oliver. I think I always have and this is just another stepping stone in our relationship. Just another part of our journey that we need to work through. I think somewhere in my subconscious I'm still waiting for the penny to drop, still waiting for you to say that you changed your mind. I think that with time, all of this will fall into place and we both can start functioning normally."

"Will you ever be able to forgive me for everything I put you through?"

"Oliver, do you really think that I would be here, with you in the same bed if I hadn't?"

"Well…" He gives her a smirk. "You did say I was hot, so maybe that's why you're here?"

"Aww, look at you making jokes when I'm trying to be all serious. Something wrong with this picture?" He laughs and places a peck on her lips.

"I love you Oliver Queen."

"I don't think it will ever be as much as I love you Felicity."

He places another kiss on her lips and envelops her with his strong arms as she leans against his chest. After a little while, she falls asleep again and Oliver can only hope that the nightmares for her will end soon.


End file.
